"Achtung, there is a dummkopf in business class, I repeat..."

I should not be allowed in business class. Too foreign to me. Too many buttons and protocols and politeness. I should be back in the cattle section eating bad food. Or wishing that I had some bad food. My flight left at 0200. I was exhausted. On purpose. I wanted to sleep. At the end of my sleep, I was awoken to a woman speaking german. I of course thought that A) I was still asleep or B) I had died and was now in german hell for all of the bad german accents that I have done in the past. I learned German from watching "Hogan's Heros," didn't you? Turns out that it was a Lufthansa flight attendant offering me breakfast. The same one who told me to put my bag in the coat closet. In german. Listen, Frau Blucher {horse whinny}, I have enough trouble with english...
So I woke up, had a lovely breakfast; during which I started to watch "The Green Lantern." In the movie there is an aerial combat scene. Just at that moment we hit turbulence.  So as the hero was fighting for control of his airplane, we were getting bounced around in the sky. The ultimate 3-D experience. Wow, these Germans think of everything...